Love is not a 'pros' and a 'cons' list. Love is just love and sometimes there will be a something that one of the others has to work through. And I believe love, real love, will get through it, in time. And it's not a rule that the first year has to be problem free to know it's good, and THEN it gets more boring and difficult. Although trust can be broken as the first year is unfortunately suppose to set the tone and this is harder to rectify. I understand and completley respect that. But I am determined. You can have the good fortune to work through the bullshit right away and spend the next 80 years in the honeymoon phase. That's what I want. That's what I believe.
When you fall in love, you're not buying a house or a car (though it is the biggest emotional investment of your life as they are your confidant and your best friend), you are investing in a another human being. And if a person is intrinsically good and there is love, amazing things happen. Only love (for yourself and from and for someone else) can make you the best you can be. And what I have learned, it is the right love that finally makes you want to do this, and it is a beautiful thing- as hard as growth, much like physical growing pains, can be. It is so worth it. Not only for the relationship, but for yourself. Surely a bad pattern permeates other areas of your life and would only be a wonderful thing for you over all to release and let go of, in all areas.
Better than any money or success or anything you can touch. That feeling for someone else. When we are together I feel healthy, I feel happy, we talk, we challenge each other, we love to laugh ,we have ideas. When I wasn't acting like an insecure 'argumentative for no reason' fool, we we've been a very happy couple. The best relationship I've ever known. Being in love with him makes me want to be a better person. I don't crave for other things when I'm with him.
I don't believe that after a few years, there is a free pass to act miserable and inappropriate and only then do you get a free pass to work through it because you were so perfect the first year or two. In a way, I believe if a fault comes out that is something the person should work through for themselves anyway at the beginning, and you get through it, it gets all the bullshit out of the way for the future. Problem is, when it happens too soon, you have to build trust again. That the beauty of the 'thing' happening down the line is easier, because there is a solid foundation of trust built, or comfortable familiarity and you just stay and are more apt to see it through.
I believe even if it's at the beginning there should be a chance. I know there is more pros than one big fat changeable con. I believe in love and I believe there is a chance.
*And I love when things are symbotic. My friend Sheryar (the chiropractor and speaker that I've mentioned here on my blog before) posted this just today. And I couldn't agree more. He's right.
Sheryar Masud: In life, like weather it is in health, wealth and or close relationships with people that will make you stretch. Be with people that will help you stay accountable. Train yourself like a olympic athlete. I have a coach and people in my life, like my wife and business partner that keep me accountable for everything to stay on course. It is sad if a person is the same year... after year. I know people that I have known thier shortcomings for years that have never really GROWN UP PERSONALLY! Don't wait-Grow!
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I think it is no mistake that things come to your life just when you need to hear and see them.
